While out on my bike ....

Everything to do with cycling
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Joan
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While out on my bike ....

Post by Joan » 10 months ago

(like "meanwhile", but for cycling stuff. Ride reports should stay in "My ride today")

On the weekend I rode through Richmond Park. I am overweight, with a big arse so code strongly female and middle aged from behind. I was moving steadily up a hill, but not fast, and I was close passed by a cyclist. Not omigod-I-could-have-died close, just you-have-the-entire-road,-use-it close. Startling and annoying. He was male, young and skinny. As he passed, I thought, what is that disgusting dirty white thing hanging from his saddle? A second later I recognised it was bike balls.

If I had my kit with me, I would have shot a tranquiliser dart into him so I could use him in my study of toxic masculinity.
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JohnToo
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Re: While out on my bike ....

Post by JohnToo » 4 months ago

Churchwarden [as we left the 8am service this morning and he saw me unlocking my bike]: Cold day for cycling
Me: That's why I've got my woolly hat [pulling same on]
Churchwarden: Yes, but why aren't you wearing your helmet?
Me: Why would I want to wear a helmet?
Churchwarden [letting himself in to his Land Rover Discovery]: To protect you when a car skids on the these icy roads
Me: What makes you think that strapping a kitchen ceiling tile to my head will protect me from a ton and a half of out of control metal?
Churchwarden: [started looking a bit shell shocked]....

To be fair, he's basically a decent bloke with a heart of gold, and at the end of the conversation he apologised for giving me grief and I apologised for biting his head off. :)
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JohnToo
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Re: While out on my bike ....

Post by JohnToo » 3 months ago

How very confidence-inspiring....
Annotation 2020-02-02 164632.png
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LowlifeDes
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Re: While out on my bike ....

Post by LowlifeDes » 3 months ago

JohnToo wrote:
3 months ago
How very confidence-inspiring....

Annotation 2020-02-02 164632.png
Glass half empty or half full?
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Joan
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Re: While out on my bike ....

Post by Joan » 3 months ago

JohnToo wrote:
3 months ago
How very confidence-inspiring....

Annotation 2020-02-02 164632.png
You think it's a guide to travelling with your bike.

In fact, it's a koan. If you had refreshed the page, it would have asked "What is the sound of one hand clapping?"
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Joan
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Re: While out on my bike ....

Post by Joan » 3 months ago

Personal to Google Maps: if a cycle route includes the phrase "dismount and cross the pedestrian overpass" then it is not a cycle route.
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LowlifeDes
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Re: While out on my bike ....

Post by LowlifeDes » 3 months ago

Joan wrote:
3 months ago
In fact, it's a koan.
Is that the next model up from you?
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Joan
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Re: While out on my bike ....

Post by Joan » 3 months ago

LowlifeDes wrote:
3 months ago
Is that the next model up from you?
🤣

How have I never noticed that before?

I assume it's like Mercedes or drugs, and they are the class below me.
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